We became friends instantly and, sometimes together with Timam, did a couple of offroad rides on the backyards of Ngong’ hills. I liked her because she took care of herself, she was not whiny and did not in any way demand any chivalry from us. I can tell you that on this particular trip I’m about to narrate to you, we once stopped to fuel at a petrol station, and she offered to pay for all our fuel. She is the only woman (even at less than 55kgs) who has dared ride my heavy bike. I do have the video, ye doubting Thomasses. Yes, we greatly admire her, and so we invited her to join us on this trip. Feminists tell us that men are intimidated by strong independent women. Dear rabid feminist, shut up and make better friends.

Back to Wednesday. Tintin takes really long to get to Kitale. It’s understandable. She rides a small displacement bike, a Lifan 200cc offroad bike. She is doing roads she is completely unfamiliar with. She also sneaks in a date with her friend in Eldoret, and claims it took only about 20 minutes, but I’m not buying it. I suspect that date took an hour. Our plan was to spend the night at Lokichar, but it’s becoming evident that that is far fetched. 4:30pm finds me seated alone at a restaurant in Kitale, waiting for food. Timam has gone to shop for some waterproof clothing, since he forgot his at home back in Nairobi. That’s when Tintin calls to tell me she has arrived, and almost fells me with a hug. Timam arrives moments later with very colourful red and blue stuff worn over his leather suit. We settle down to a hearty meal of coconut fish and chapati.

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PART ONE: Day one and Two | Kitale to Kakuma

Fish and chapati cleared, (well, some of the chapati finds its way into the pockets of the riding gear of one of us) we mount our bikes, fuel and begin riding towards Kapenguria. It’s almost dark now, and I have expressed my discomfort with riding in the dark. If anything, I wanted to spend the night in Kitale and begin the next day early and fresh. When I mention waking up early and beginning the next day’s ride before dawn, Timam and Tintin scream that idea down in unison. They are not morning people at all!

I eventually reluctantly agree with their plan to ride till Kainuk in the dark. By the time we get to Kapenguria, my mind is set: I’m not going any further. I tell them this emphatically, like a donkey that has refused to take a step further.

The road from Kitale to Kapenguria has changed my mind. It’s rough, with unmarked bumps, potholes the size of mini-craters are sprinkled generously on the road. Bodaboda riders are not behaving well. To top that up, I’m sleepy and my focus is not good. I ride slow. Too slow. Even Tintin on her 200cc bike gets upset with my slowness. My bike is heavy and loaded. I carry the tools we might need in case of a breakdown. I carry a tent. I had to work on the road, so I have my computer with me too. With all that weight, recovering after a mishap would not be easy. And that’s why I refuse to go any further. Slow and careful is the game for me. They insist that we ride on, but I give them a deaf ear.

“This is my stop. I’m going to find a place to spend the night here, and go on tomorrow,” I say with finality when we get to Kapenguria.

Timam loses his cool. He and Tintin are stopped a little ahead of me. I can tell he has lost his cool by the way his arms are flailing upwards, like one of those inflated humanoid balloons with air being pumped through them. His colourful red and blue rain gear perfectly completes that picture. I’m wearing earplugs, so I can’t hear anything he is angrily saying. I’m certain it’s equally colourful. He turns once to point back at me, and the only word I hear is “mentality.”

He got a really good Schuberth helmet recently. If you know helmets, you know Schuberth is the Holy Grail of helmets. He can see very well and ride very comfortably at night. The helmet has a Pinlock mechanism, and so, in his own words: “What is fog?” I know he wants to ride at night because he is thoroughly enjoying it. Plus, his body is weird. In the evening when the rest of our bodies are shutting down for the night, his is waking up and as active as if on alien steroids. That’s why he has done, in his own words: “what I believe stands as the most daring all night long motorcycle ride of all time in Kenya.” (Link to his story on this at the end). He basically boots up when the rest of us are preparing to shut down.

Therefore, his head engulfed in Schuberth comfort and convenience, it’s unfathomable to him that there exists in the world another human who would not want to ride at night. He threatens to quit the ride altogether and ride back to Nairobi. His reason is that if we don’t push further tonight, we won’t make it to Nakodok and back within the days we have. As you will see, how early he departs the next day exposes this to be a superfluous concern.

Tintin gets off her bike and comes to talk to me. “You guys should compromise,” she says.

“It’s simple,” I say. “You guys want to ride at night. I don’t. I want to wake up and begin riding early. You don’t. Why don’t you guys go ahead and ride on tonight, I will wake up early and catch up?” I explain that I do not see the reason to ride so slow in the dark and take three hours to cover a distance that would take me two in the morning when there’s light.

For some reason that idea does not make sense to them. I will leave them to explain why the hell not. Tintin gets exasperated. Last time I saw her this exasperated was when her son was getting into a silly fight with another boy. Boys will be boys, eh? She says something to Timam, then gets on her bike and angrily zooms off into the dark. Timam follows her. I presume they have decided to do away with me and my “mentality.” I look for a place to spend the night. I find a good one with nice parking for my bike. Within an hour, I have showered, had some tea and mandazis (was still too full for proper food) and settled in a warm bed. I text them to tell them my situation.

Later I receive a text from them saying they are spending the night at Ortum. They have been informed that the road ahead is too dangerous to proceed. “The roads are marked so you won’t have anything to worry about in the morning,” says part of the message with a good measure of juvenile sarcasm. I’m wondering if whatever beds they found at Ortum are as warm and comfortable as mine…

I sleep well, and wake up fifteen minutes before my alarm goes off, refreshed, with lots of psyche for the day. My head is clear and my spirits high. By 6am I’m on the road. I’m glad to have chosen to do this ride on a new day. The road is real curvy after Kapenguria. I would not have enjoyed these curves as much in the dark.

I reach Kainuk and send a message to tell my colleagues so. Tintin tells me they have not left Ortum, and asks me to wait for them. I tell her I will wait for them at Lokichar while I have breakfast. I arrive at Lokichar and text them again. And guess what? They still have NOT left Ortum!! The guy who was so angry with me because he thought I was sabotaging plans to reach Nakodok by refusing to ride at night, and he has not began today’s ride way past 9am! Schuberth!

I’m now 130km ahead. So much for night riding. I have a quick breakfast, and decide to go on. The tarmac road ends at Lokichar. From there is 90km of hard offroad till Lodwar. It took me 3hours last time. I intend to go slow, they will catch up. Just as I leave Lokichar, a security officer at a security post stops me.

“Habari ya leo?” I say.
“Oh, wewe ni Mkenya?”

I confirm that indeed I’m a Kenyan, just touring the country. I tell him about the other riders coming up behind, and in a minute or two he lets me be on my way. The trip to Lodwar is tiring but uneventful.

I arrive in Lodwar feeling a gladness to be here again. I stop at a petrol station to fuel, and a man with locks stops to say hi. He gives me very good information on the condition of the road ahead. He tells me sections of the road are tarmacked, which is good news. It means that we can still make it to the border and back within the days we have, despite having lost some time according to our original plan. Our plan assumed almost 700km of offroad from Lokichar to Nakodok and back. He also tells me that the security situation is good all the way to Lokichoggio. It’s only from there onward that we have to be wary of conflicts between the Turkana and South Sudanese people.

“How bad is it?” I ask.
“Well, vehicles still pass, but you never know, anything might happen at any time!”
“Ah! So it’s just like Kainuk?”
“Exactly!”

That gives me hope of our mission not being stopped by insecurity.